Reading the book's, Dimitri's point of view of Frostbite
by Mackenzy26
Summary: This is another one of the reading the books stories. But it's very different. Instead of reading Richelle Mead's version of Frostbite they're reading Little Dhampir18's frostbite version in Dimitri's point of view. Set after Last Sacrifice. I don't own VA! This is the first eight chapters so far.
1. Chapter 1

We were sitting around in the same places as the night before when we finished the second book of this strange series about our lives. It was the second one in Rose's point of view; they had given us two sets. One in Rose's point of view and one in mine. We had to read the book in Rose's point of view first and then read the same book in my point of view right after. I was a bit shocked after listening to Rose's thoughts in Frostbite; she really was a better person than me. I wished we could skip this book in my point of view; all it's going to do is hurt Rose and make everyone see what an asshole I am. I sighed, not letting any of my emotions show on my face. "Alright, let's get this show on the road." Lissa proclaimed.

Rose laughed, turning to me she said. "Yeah, I really wanna know what was going through your head at this time, Comrade." I gave her a small smile, already bracing myself. "Who wants to read?" Rose asked.

"I will." I said, wearily. She handed me the book and studied my face with curious eyes, I hoped she didn't see what was making me upset. I started reading.

**I stood under the massive brick building's shadows. Waiting for Rose to arrive. She was assigned to take a test that all novices do. It was known as the Qualifier. Every novice takes it their junior year. Rose was a senior and had yet to take it. She had escaped the Academy along with her Moroi best friend Lissa Dragomir. It took everything to get her back, thanks to me and my team of guardians. If it weren't for us Rose and Lissa would still be on the run. It had just begun to snow, light, crystalline flakes drifted gently down.**

"Wow, Comrade." Rose teased. "I didn't realize you had such a poetic mind."

"He always has." My mother inserted proudly. I blushed as she beamed at me. "Though he insists on keeping it hidden." I didn't respond to either of them, knowing they would be so proud and teasing later. I glanced around and took in the sight of the six couches around me with my closest friends n them. Christian, Lissa, my mother, Viktoria, Rose's parents, Adrian, Sydney, my grandmother, Mia, and Eddie. They said more people would join us later but I couldn't imagine who else there could be. I sighed and continued reading.

**Melting as they made contact with the wet Earth. I stood in front of a Honda Pilot. A car that Rose and I will be driving in for the next five hours. High up guardians visited at the Academy, and met individually to discuss students' commitment to being guardians. Rose was scheduled to meet with Arthur Schoenberg, a friend of mine, and someone I highly respect. Rose arrived, her profile coming into view as she rushed towards me, late like usual. A couple months ago I had fallen for her, and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't seem to stop those feelings from pouring out of me.**

Every woman in the room smiled at me. I grimaced inside, waiting for the disapproval.

**It was only a week now that I finally took hold of them. I kept repeating the phrase: It's the right thing. Rose needed a teacher that was strict, understanding, determined and much much more. And those simple four words had prevented my feelings from leaking through the cracks. "I know, I know. Sorry I'm late." I couldn't help but wonder why she was late. But instantly reminded myself that it didn't matter. I was Rose's teacher and mentor and that was it. There was nothing more to it.**

I could see Rose frowning out of the corner of my eye, mulling over my past thoughts. I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her tightly to my chest, I had to make her see that I loved her more than anything. Also try to make her not read too much into anything I say.

"**Who else is going?" She asked, the snowflakes landing on her dark hair, melting instantly. **

**I shrugged. "Just you and me."**

"**How far away is it?" I could see the old attraction in her eyes. The feeling of wanting something we couldn't have had taken over both of us. And the feelings had burst out when Victor Dashkov put a lust charm on us. It was cruel of him, and wouldn't have worked unless both victims had feelings for each other. And back then I did have feelings for her. They still remained locked up, but I knew they were still there, growing stronger and stronger. "Five hours."**

"**Oh." We got into the car, Rose sat in the passenger seat while I drove. The dim, snowy roads would have been difficult for humans to navigate but were no problem for our dhampir eyes. It was a while before any of us spoke. Silence falling heavy in the car. "Don't they usually come to the Academy? I mean, I'm all for the field trip, but why are we going to them?" Rose asked.**

"**Actually, you're just going to a him, not a them. Since this is a special case and he's doing us a favor, we're the ones making the trip."**

"**Who is he?"**

"**Arthur Schoenberg."**

**She jerked her gaze from the road to me. "What?" She squeaked.I knew why she was so shocked. Arthur was a legend. He was one of the great Strigoi slayers in all of guardian history. And used to be the head of the Guardian's Council. He eventually retired and gone back to protecting one of the royal families, the Badicas. "Wasn't…wasn't there anyone else available?" She asked in a small voice.**

**I tried my best to hide the smile that was playing at my lips. "You'll be fine. Besides, if Art approves of you, that's a great recommendation to have on your record." Silence fell in the car once again. By the way I saw her body tense out of the corner of my eye I knew she was nervous. I needed to calm her down, it was my job to do such a thing. "You'll be fine. " I repeated. "The good in your record outweighs the bad." I could see the corners of her lips tighten up in a smile. She turned her face towards me, sneaking a peak that she thought only she knew about. After a long moment she averted her gaze. "Thanks, Coach." She teased as she snuggled back into the seat.**

"**I'm here to help." I replied. I found myself relaxing more as we traveled down the snowy road. Something that didn't happen often, I was usually tense and ready for action. But like in the van, that Rose and I had taken when we escorted Lissa to the mall, I relaxed. Not much can happen in a car when it's in motion. Although my eyes were still darting back and forth as we passed tall looming trees.**

"Geez, Comrade. Take a breather." Rose muttered, "I don't want you worrying yourself to death." She said that last part with so much love and concern that I kissed her on the cheek and brought her even closer.

"I think you need a drink to relax." Adrian drawled, slurring his words as he spoke. "Here have some of mine." Eddie, Mia,Christian, Rose, Abe and Viktoria laughed while Janine, my mother, my grandmother, and Lissa looked at him reproachfully. I just smiled.

"No thanks, buddy. I think I'm good." He just shrugged and took another swig. I turned to Rose and she smiled while everyone waited impatiently for me to continue.

"**You know what would really help?" Rose asked.**

"**Hmm?"**

"**If you turned off this crap music and put on something that came out before the Berlin Wall went down."**

**I laughed. "Your worst class is history, yet somehow, you know everything about Eastern Europe."**

"**Hey, gotta have material for my jokes, Comrade."**

**Still smiling, I turned the radio dial. To a country station. Knowing what her reaction would be. I was the mentor and she was the student. Who's to say that I can't torture her?**

"**Hey this isn't what I had in mind." She exclaimed.**

**I was on the verge of laughing again. "Pick. It's one or the other."**

**She sighed. "Go back to the 1980s stuff." I flipped the dial as she crossed her arms over her chest. The song: Video Killed the Radio Star boomed through the Honda. Arthur and the Badicas lived in a small town along I-90, not far from the Billings. Some of the Moroi world believed that big cities were best since they allowed vampires to be lost in the crowds; that their nocturnal schedules didn't raise suspicion. Others opted for less populated towns, believing that if there were fewer people to notice you, then you were less likely to be noticed. Rose convinced me to stop for food at a twenty-four hour diner along the way. I had to admit I was hungry as well. The only other stop we made was to buy gas, It was around noon when we arrived. The house was built in a rambler style, all on level with gray stained wood sliding and big bay windows-tinted to block. It was new and expensive- the royals had no problem with money. It was located out in the middle of the forest. Away from the population and curious eyes. Rose jumped down from the Pilot. She and I walked up to the house, following a river rock sidewalk that cut through the front yard. Careful of my footing as I walked, I knew there would be patches of ice along the rocky sidewalk. Rose slipped on the ice, proving my theory. I instantly reached out to steady her. In that moment I had the weird feeling of déjà vu, flashing back to the first night we'd met, when I had saved her from the similar fall. I held on to her a moment longer. **

**Letting go I asked. "You okay?"**

"**Yeah," she casting accusing eyes at the icy sidewalk. "Haven't these people heard of salt?"**

**I suddenly stopped walking. Salt..I remembered the time when Arthur told me that he hated it when people didn't ice the roadways or sidewalks. He had once done it himself when one of his charges didn't. This shouldn't have been any different. Something was wrong. I looked around the broad white plains that were surrounding us, before turning my attention back on the house. Rose stayed silent besides me, knowing that now wasn't the time to ask questions. I studied the building, looking down at the icy sidewalk. Arthur said he was going to be here, I had talked on the phone with him the other night. There should be no reason for him not to be here. Let alone salt the sidewalk. I glanced at the driveway, covered in a sheet of snow broken only by our footprints. I approached the front door, I could hear Rose's footsteps in tow. I stopped again, this time to study the door. It had been broken into, the lock on it shattered, as if someone slammed their body up against the door. Closer observation showed scuffs along the door's edge. I lightly ran my fingers along where the door met its frame. When I touched the door's handle it jiggled, it had most definitely been broken into. "Rose, go wait in the car."**

"**But, wh-"**

"**Go." I filled that word with power, making her back up as she retreated down the lawn and to the Honda. She was safe, that's all that mattered to me.**

"That's so sweet, Dimitri." Rose murmured. "I love you, but all that mattered to me was that you were safe." I gave her a light, but love filled kiss.

"As I love you, but don't worry about me." She shot me a look. I sighed and turned back to the book.

**As soon as I heard the door shut to the pilot I pushed the door open, moving inside. There wasn't as much damage as I had expected. But that didn't stop me from observing every room. There were claw marks here and there against the wall, as if someone had slashed at something I touched them, they were set deep in the chestnut wood. As I made my way to the back of the house I noticed a broken window, the snow drifting in from it. And bodies. I realized now that it had been Strigoi, how they got past the wards was beyond me. Concerned I made my way out of the house. Ready to protect Rose. I didn't know if the intruders were still here, but instincts ran too strong. I looked at the Pilot, not surprised when I saw that it's door was wide open. It was sunny out, she couldn't be in trouble. Why didn't she ever listen to me? Following Rose's footsteps and to the back of the house. Where the bodies were. I found her standing still as a statue, inside the house, taking in the horrible scene. I could tell by her posture that she was about to let a scream escape her. Quickly I put a gloved hand over her mouth. Closing the scream. She started to struggle. And after a moment realized that it was me. "Why don't you ever listen? You'd be dead if they were still here." She didn't make any attempts to answer me. Even with my hand over her mouth. After a long moment I removed my hand, but stayed close to her. Ready to protect her if anything decided to jump out at us. There was a dead women, Lady Badica, and a man, Lord Badica, and their child, a small body that was slumped beside the couch. Across the room as another. And another. Bodies and blood everywhere.**

**A few minutes passed before she turned around to face me. "It's daytime." She whispered. "Bad things don't happen in the day." There was a hint of desperation in her voice.**

"**Bad things can happen anytime. And this didn't happen during the day. This probably happened a couple nights ago." Rose peeked at the bodies. She glanced at a man's body near the room's entrance to the hallway. Sudden realization kicked in. "Arthur Schoenberg." I said.**

**She continued to stare at him. "He's dead. How can he be dead? How could a Strigoi kill Arthur Schoenberg?" I didn't answer. I had noticed something shining in her hand before I even entered. Although it didn't occur to me, until now, that it was a stake. My hand traveled down, closing around the hand that held the stake. She flinched.**

"**Where did you get this?" She loosened her grip, letting me take it from her.**

"**Outside. In the ground."**

**I held up the stake, studying the surface as it shone in the sunlight. A stake in the ground could only mean one thing. "It broke the ward." Wards were magic rings cast by Moroi.**

"Ugh!" Viktoria exclaimed. "Your almost as bad as Rose with all the explaining things that we already now." I ignored her.

**Like the stakes, they were made using magic from all four of the elements. They required strong Moroi magic-users, often a couple for each element. The wards could block Strigoi because magic was charged with life, and the Strigoi had none. But wards faded quickly and took a lot of maintenance. Most Moroi didn't use them, but certain places kept them up. St. Vladimir's Academy was ringed with several. There had been a ward here, but it had been shattered when someone drove the stake through it. Their magic conflicted with each other, making the stake win.**

"**Strigoi can't touch stakes. And no Moroi or dhampir would do it."**

**She was right, but moroi, dhampirs, and strigoi weren't the only species on this planet. "A human might." I stated looking down at her.**

**She met my eyes. "Human's don't help Strigoi-" She stopped. I saw realization flash in her brown eyes. Realizing that strigoi weren't limited to the sunlight and magic if they had a human to help them. I was still ready for anything to attack. But watching her wage this mental battle made me have sympathy.**

Rose shot me a glare at that last word.

**She was too young to be witnessing death. This incident would affect her life forever, no novice her age should be seeing the things she had. And because of this, was the reason why she was going to make a kick ass guardian. She was already dealing with death at a very young age. Who knew what she will be dealing with in a year or so?**

"**This changes everything, doesn't it?" she asked.**

"**Yeah, it does."**

Chapter 2

"Alright who wants to read the next chapter?" I looked around the room.

"I will." My grandmother announced, Rose grinned at her. I looked wary, I really didn't want her to dive into my mind. She began.

**I pulled out my cell phone, dialing the head of the Guardian Council. Reporting what had happened at the Badica house. They said they'd be here in a couple of hours. Rose left me in the house, saying that she was going to wait out in the car. I examined the house further, trying to see if there was any evidence on who the strigoi might be. For instance hair, fingernails, skin cells. But to my dismay, nothing was left. Sighing I decided to join Rose. We didn't, but that was okay. I was lost in thought anyways. I was lost in thought anyways. Thinking about how this incident was going to change the moroi world. Never before had humans worked with strigoi. Never before had they even known they'd existed. As Rose said: this changes everything. Finally the first group of guardians showed up, I opened the car door and glanced over at Rose. "You should see how this is done." I figured since all this happened Rose should receive somewhat of her test. She needed to graduate, and I was determined to make that happen. She hesitated for a moment and then got out of the car to follow me. I knew the guardians that had arrived. Some I went to school with, the others I met when guarding moroi. They were surprised to find a novice on the scene, but none of them protested Rose's presence. She walked behind us as the guardians examined the house. They didn't touch anything but they knelt by the bodies and studied the bloodstains and broken windows. I had discovered earlier that the strigoi had entered the house through more than just the front door and back patio. The guardians discussed what was best to do about the situation. They asked me how this had all happened, how they had managed to get through the wards. I reported telling them that it was most likely humans. I was positive. Tamara, the only girl in the group of guardians, knelt down next to Arthur. She was my age, we had guarded the same moroi for years. She had black hair that barely touched her shoulders. Sadness flickered in her gray eyes as she studied the dead guardian's face. "Oh, Arthur." She sighed. "Never thought I'd see this day. He was my mentor." With another sigh Tamara rose. **

"I could never have kept that calm if it were you." Rose murmured. "I didn't, I wish I could have the kind of control that you have. I know you all would've been calmer." I looked at her, shocked. And I wasn't the only one. She glanced up at our expressions and did a double take. "What?"

"You really think that I would have been able to keep calm? I would have freaked out; I would've cried and killed things." This time it was her looking at me like I'd grown a second head. She shook her head slowly, not believing my words. I grabbed her tightly and pulled her onto my lap. "Don't ever think that I could live a second without you without losing my mind." I kissed her passionately and then montioned for my grandmother to continue.

**I had known her well enough to remember her mentioning Arthur. Back then I was shocked that she had possessed such skills. Later on learning that Arthur was the answer behind that. I could see Rose tense. She was at a distance from me but that didn't stop me from noticing the way her muscles flexed. I prepared for Rose's outburst. "How could they do that?" She blurted out. Six sets of eyes turned to her. I was curious as to what she was going to say next. "How could they kill him?"**

**Tamara gave a small shrug. "The same way they kill everyone else. He's mortal, just like the rest of us."**

"**Yeah, but he's..you know, Arthur Schoenberg."**

**Time for her test. "You tell us, Rose. You've seen the house. Tell us how they did it." I said.  
She took a moment to think about my question. Finally she spoke, and I knew she was going to be correct, by the flash of realization in her eyes. "There were four points of entry, which means at least four strigoi. There were seven moroi and three guardians. Too many kills. Four strigoi couldn't have taken down that many. Six probably could if they went for the guardians first and caught them by surprise. The family would have been too panicked to fight back."**

"**And how did they catch the guardians by surprise?" I prompted.**

**I knew the answer already but I wanted Rose to think of it for herself. I knew she was bright, I just had to bring it out of her.**

"You didn't think she was bright by herself?" Mia questioned, Rose looked at me curiously but not accusingly. But Abe, Janine, Yeva, and my mother were glaring at me.

"No no," I assured them. "That's not what I meant. I meant that I had to ask the right questions so that she would reveal her intelligence to others." No one said anything and Yeva just began reading without another glance in my direction.

**She hesitated. But only for a moment. "Because the wards were broken. In a household without wards there'd probably be a guardian walking the yard at night. But they wouldn't have done that here." She waited for my next question. But I didn't ask it. There was no need to ask how the wards had been broken. We all knew. We'd all seen the stake. I simply nodded and the group continued their survey. When we reached the bathroom I refused to revert my gaze. I had seen this room with Rose earlier and knew every detail. There was a dead man in here, his dry blood standing out in a stark contrast against the white tile. The smell of death filled the small room. As Rose turned away she caught a glimpse at the mirror. I followed her gaze. There was something dark red-more like brown- on the mirror. I had noticed it before. It was a note on the mirror done in blood. Written in scrawny letters.**

_**Poor poor Badicas. So few left. One royal family nearly gone. Others to follow.**_

Viktoria snorted in disgust.

**I could hear Tamara snort in disgust from behind. The Badicas were one of the smaller royal clans. But there were more Badicas out there probably about two hundred. Although there were a lot more royals with bigger families. Like the Ivashkovs. That family was huge and widespread. But some royal families didn't have as much as the Badicas or the Ivashkovs. Like the Dragomirs. Lissa was the only one left.**

"Not anymore." Lissa sang, smiling. I grinned, happy that she seemed to be accepting her sister, Jill.

**If the strigoi were meaning to kill off all the royals then surely they'd go after Lissa next. Which meant more protection from me and Rose. I took the guardians around the rest of the house. Rose was quiet. So quiet that I had forgotten that she was there.**

At that Rose's face went blank, only momentarily. Like she was suppressing something she didn't want others to see. I sighed and she looks up at me questioningly but I just shook my head. I don't know how I'll live with causing my Roza any pain.

**When we finally got into the car to ride back to St. Vladimir's, Rose slammed the door hard. I glanced at her in surprise. "What's wrong?"**

"**Are you serious? How could ask that? You were there. You saw that." She exclaimed, incredulous.**

"**I did," I agreed. "But I'm not taking it out on the car."**

**She fastened her seat belt and glowered in my direction. "I hate them. I hate them all! I wish I'd been there. I would've ripped their throats out!"**

**She was yelling by now. And I stared at her calmly, astonished at her outburst. "You really think that's true?" I asked her. "You think you could've done better than Art Schoenberg after seeing what the strigoi did in there? After seeing what Natalie did to you?"**

**She faltered. Natalie, Victor's daughter, had turned strigoi in order to free her father. And in the process of doing so Rose had gotten in the way and nearly gotten herself killed. Luckily for her I had found the blood and tracked Natalie down. Just in time to square off with her and kill her. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. After a long moment she opened her eyes."I'm sorry." She said more calmly. I was surprised and concerned from her sudden outburst. That wasn't like Rose. Sure she was reckless and got out of hand at times but she was never like this. **

"**It's okay." I said concerned for her as I reached over and placed my hand on hers for a few moments. Then I removed it and started the car. "It's been a long day. For all of us." When we got back to the Academy around midnight, everyone knew about the massacre. The vampiric school day had just ended. I noticed Rose's sluggish posture and ordered her to immediately go back to her dorm room and get some sleep. I started to feel the same way. Although I didn't show it. I left her to consult with the other guardians about the attack after she promised to do as I said. I arrived at the main office and Kirova practically dragged me inside. All the school guardians were huddled in her office talking about the attack. As soon as I stepped in the room they started bombarding me with questions. I told them everything, how we discovered that humans had helped the strigoi and what the crime scene looked like. At the end of everything Kirova spoke up. "We need to send the students to a safer place if the strigoi are really after the royals."**

"**Yes but where?" A guardian spoke up.**

"**We could send them to the Court, that's the safest place." She replied back.**

**I shook my head, "We cant, not all of the Academy's students will fit."**

"**Then we'll only send the royals."**

**I looked at her shocked. Why was it that moroi were more worried about the royals? Why not worry about all of their race. I shook my head again. "No, we have to protect everyone."**

**She sighed, tapping her long fingers on the hard wood of her desk. "Then what do you suggest we do Belikov?"**

**I shrugged. "Can't we rent a place out?" I had remembered hearing that moroi would rent a place out that belonged to them, in order to keep themselves safe. "There has to be a place that is equipped with wards and guardians?"**

"**What about the ski lodge in Idaho?" Alberta spoke up. "That's where most of the moroi families go during the Christmas break."**

**I nodded in agreement. "We have the money to rent out rooms to each of the students." Kirova started to protest but I cut her off. "If you don't like that idea then assign two or three students a room."**

**Kirova looked at me through her glasses. Scorning at the thought of spending money. "I'll think about it."**

**Alberta wouldn't take that. "Please, the students would love it, and if the royals are really worried about everything they can go to Court, but the non-royal families have to go to the ski lodge."**

**Kirova looked between Alberta and I. The other guardians had fallen silent. Obviously liking the idea. After dreading two minutes Kirova finally spoke. "Alright, we'll go at the beginning of break."**

"So that's where they got the idea." Christian mumbled, looking at me appreciatively. I grinned at him and nodded.

"Who wants to read next?" Yeva spoke up.

"I will." Janine said softly. "And we can eat lunch after this chapter is over."

Chapter 3

She cleared her throat and started to read.

**As I walked out into the fresh night air I could tell there was a change in subject between the students. By the way they were buzzing with excitement I had a pretty good idea on what it was. The word had gotten out that there was a mandatory ski trip. I wasn't surprised that all the students knew about it, gossip spread around the Academy like wildfire. As I walked around the gym to wait for Rose to arrive, I discovered that I didn't have to. She was talking to a red headed boy just in front of the gym doors. He noticed me first and stared past Rose, causing her to turn around and meet my eyes. Mason swept an gallant bow. Saying something to Rose before he opened the door and disappeared into the frigid darkness. Rose turned around to join me.**

"Tsk tsk, Rose." Adrian said. "Too many men around you." She blushed.

"Listen, Ivashkov. You already heard what happened between me and Mason. _Everything_ that happened. Now we get to learn about Dimitri and Tasha." She said firmly, everyone turned to look at me and I blushed. Rose looked up me with a smirk that slid right off her face as she took in my expression. "C'mon Comrade." She whispered. "It can't be as bad as what I put you through with that one Mason scene." Oh if she only knew how bad it was going to be, it would be a thousand times worse. I gave her a sad smile and turned to Janine. She took it as a cue to continue reading.

**I had a special exercise planned for her today. Although it wasn't at all what she expected. I could see the excitement in her eyes as she took in the scene before us. Practice dummies arranged on the far wall, dummies that looked lifelike. Men and women who wore ordinary clothes, with rubbery skin and different hair and eye colors. Their expressions ranged from happy to scared to angry. Rose has practiced with the dummies before, using them to work on her kicks and punches. But today she will be doing something entirely different. I saw her glance down at the stake in my hand. Her eyes eager to hold the weapon. "Sweet." She breathed. As if in shock. The stakes weren't wooden like most faerie tales make them up to be. Real stakes were made of silver, and had a hand grip in the bottom, almost like a dagger's. The rest of the stake lost its resemblance from there. Rather than having a flat blade, the stake had a thick, rounded body that narrowed to a point. It was about the size of my forearm, and was heavier than it seemed. I leaned against the wall. With one hand I tossed the stake in the air, making it spin around in a cartwheel a couple of times before it came back down. Without effort I caught it, hilt first. Excitement burst through her. "Please tell me I get to learn how to do that today."**

**Amusement filled me. "You'll be lucky if I let you hold it today." I said as I flipped the stake into the air again. I could see her eyes following it longingly. After a few protests she finally tossed her backpack on the floor, throwing off her coat in the process and crossed her arms expectantly.**

"**You want me to tell you how they work and why I should always be cautious around them." She announced. I stopped flipping the stake. How'd she know that?**

Rose laughed at my surprise. Lissa and Viktoria joined in. I just rolled my eyes at them and smiled. Rose would always be able to see through me.

**She laughed. "Come on. You don't think I know how you work by now? We've been doing this for this for almost three months. You always make me talk safety and responsibility before I can do anything fun."**

"**I see. Well, I guess you've got it all figured out. By all means, go on with the lesson. I'll just wait over here until you need me again." Tucking the stake away into my leather sheath that was hanging at my belt I walked away, making myself comfortable against the wall, stuffing my hands into my pockets. She stared at me, confused, yes Rose I am serious. At last she figured out that I wasn't joking, With a shrug she launched into what she knew. She gave me the basic background on silver stakes and what they do. I asked her a couple clarifying questions to find out how deep her knowledge went. I purposely kept her talking until 10 minutes before our session ended. I then led her over to one of the dummies. Who was a man with blonde hair and a goatee. I reached down to my sheath, taking out my stake without handing it to Rose. "Where are you going to put this?" I asked.**

"**In the heart." She replied irritably. "I already told you that like a hundred times. Can I have it now?" **

**I smiled down at her. "Where's the heart?" Making a gesture for her to show me.**

**She gave me a cold glare. I shrugged. With overdramatic emphasis, she pointed to the left side of the dummy's chest. I shook my head, she was way off. "That's not where the heart is." I told her.**

"**Sure it is. People put their hands over their hearts when they say the Pledge of Allegiance or sing the national anthem."**

Christian and Eddie broke into a fit of laughter. Rose glared at them. "I'm sorry," Eddie choked out between laughs. "I just can't help it, it's so ridiculous!" They continued laughing until Rose walked over and punched them both in the stomachs. They sobered up quickly then and Janine started reading again.

**I stared at her. Shocked that's where she got the idea from. She turned back to the dummy, staring at it for a while. Finally she tapped the center of the dummy's chest. "Is it here?"**

**I arched an eyebrow at her. "I don't know. Is it?" She was closer but her uncertainty wasn't enough to give her the stake. **

"**That's what I'm asking you!"**

"**You shouldn't have to ask me. Don't you all have to take physiology?"**

"**Yeah. Junior year. I was on "vacation" remember?" She pointed at the stake that I was still holding. "Can I please touch it now?"**

**I flipped the stake again, it caught the light, flashing brightly before it disappeared into the sheath. "I want you to tell me where the heart is next time we meet. Exactly where. And I want to know what's in the way of it too." She gave me an even icier glare than earlier, before storming off to her next class. I hadn't meant to be so cruel but that's what had to be done. I had to be a tough love mentor. **

I heard Rose mumble something about being a no love mentor and realized that was starting to catch on to how I thought of her in this book. I didn't want her to ever think I didn't love her, my heart squeezed at the thought.

**I had to try to forget her. Even if it was nearly impossible. I had to try. As I walked across campus the same words flashed in my mind. It's the right thing.**

"End of the chapter." Yeva finished, I smiled brightly. Happy to get a reprieve of the torture that was ahead.

Rose jumped up. "Yes! Food!" Everyone laughed and stood up to join her in the kitchen. We ate lunch, chatting with each other happily. A loud knock on the door startled us out of our conversation. The door opened and three guardians poured in, bringing someone with them. I gasped as I saw who it was, Tasha Ozera.

She looked around. "Guess I was missing the party."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 4

"What the hell are you doing here?" Christian bellowed at his aunt. For a moment I was too stunned to speak, but I did automatically put myself in between Tasha and Rose. I wouldn't ever let her hurt my Roza again.

Tasha shrugged. "They just took my out of my cell and brought me here. Didn't answer any of my questions about it." She looked around the room realizing how many people were here. "What are you all doing here?"

Rose spoke up. "We have to read 12 books out loud to each other and until we read them all we can't leave." Everyone but Rose was glaring at Tasha and now Eddie, Abe, Janine, Adrian, my mother, Yeva, and Christian had joined me in front of Rose and Lissa. Shielding them. I didn't want Tasha here, I hated her. Anyone that hurts my Roza is on my to-kill list are far as I'm concerned.

"Okayyyy. Well what book are you on?"

"It doesn't matter, you're not staying." Christian told her.

Lissa spoke then. "I don't think we really have a choice in the matter, Chris. I think it's the same as before, we have to read all the books before any of us get to leave." Everyone sighed then, knowing she was probably right. But Tasha just smirked at us.

"Fine, then let's get back to reading." Eddie said. We all moved back into the living room, taking the same seats as before. I sat down on Rose and my couch but before she could sit next to me I pulled her down onto my lap. I wrapped by arms around her before asking who is going to read.

"I will, I think this'll be very interesting. It's from you point of view isn't it, Dimka?" Tasha asked. I didn't say anything, just handed her the book. She cleared her throat before beginning.

**I passed some of the student's parents on the way to my first class. I recognized more than half of them. They were easy to pick out of the crowd too. Since they weren't from the school's regiment. Parents and their guardians had already started coming to campus to accompany their children to the ski resort. And I knew my next class would have more of the schools guardians than usual. I arrived at Rose's bodyguard theory class. I had known that guardians that normally worked outside the Academy were paying a visit today, although I didn't know who. Until I saw the bright red hair that belonged to a short Scottish woman. Janine Hathaway, Rose's mother. I was surprised to see her standing in front of the class, among two other guardians whom I faintly recognized. Both men, one tall but old while the other was strong and young. I nodded out of respect before taking my rightful place in the back of the classroom. Janine was tough, she was the kind of guardian that you didn't want to get stuck battling with. She was one of the few women we had, and the shortest. With being only five foot tall she looked small and helpless. But fought like a tiger. I had seem her in action, she had guarded one of my moroi's friends. And I remember the way she fought. Light as a feather and quick as a whip. If I was this surprised to see her I couldn't imagine what Rose's reaction might be. The students started to pile into the room then. And as usual Rose was the last of them. Walking in with Mason at her side. I saw her look up her eyes darting immediately to Janine. Her face darkening as she took her seat. But as she sat down her posture slummed as she seemed to sink into her chair. As if to melt right into it. Staring at her mother with complete bafflement. Stan spoke up now, introducing the guests and explaining that they were going to share real-life experiences with the class. I glanced around checking the windows and doors for any sign of danger, although not surprisingly, found none.**

**Stan paced in the front of the room. "I know this is unusual. Visiting guardians usually don't have time to stop by our classes. Our three guests, however, have made time to come and talk to you today in light of what's happened recently…" Everyone in the room knew he was talking about the Badica attack. Clearing his throat he tried again. "In light of what's happened, we thought it might be better to prepare you to learn from those currently working in the field." The class tensed with excitement. Apparently hearing gory stories was more interesting than learning from the textbook. The one time I glanced in Rose's direction she turned around and met my eyes, I averted mine quickly, hoping she didn't catch me staring at her. The old guy launched into his story. He described a time when the youngest son of the family he guarded had wandered off in a public place that strigoi were lurking in I could see Rose lean forward out of the corner of my eye. She was clearly engrossed with the story. By the time the old guy finished his story the boy had been found with no strigoi encounters. A happy ending. The younger guardian went next. Talking about how he'd gotten the drop on a strigoi stalking a moroi. Which tended to happen a lot more than others thought. I glanced around the classroom, mainly at the girls. They looked as if they were about to fall out of their chairs they were so awed by the young guardians looks. Each of them were swooning with wide, adoring eyes. I felt a pang of jealousy in my chest. Hoping that Rose didn't share the same expression. And from this angle I couldn't tell if she did or not. Which made that jealousy feeling tighten. **

"You know, Dimka." Tasha started. "If you had just stuck with me you would never have to feel that way. I only ever had eyes for you." I felt Rose tighten in my arms and I squeezed her gently.

"Shut up, Tasha. I never had eyes for you, only for Rose." Rose smiled at me gratefully and kissed me on the cheek. Tasha looked murderous but kept reading anyway. God this was going to hurt Rose even more now that Tasha could make commentary on my blasphemous thoughts.

**It was Janine's turn next. By the posture of Rose's back I could tell she despised hearing a word from her mother. And as she launched into her story Rose's posture grew darker and darker. Janine talked about how her charge, Lord Szelsky, and his wife had attended a ball put on by another prominent royal family. Several strigoi had been lying in wait. Janine had discovered one, promptly staked it, and then alerted the other guardians present. With their help, she hunted down the other strigoi lurking around and performed most of the killings. Everyone's face shown with wonder, as if they couldn't believe that a guardian was capable of killing that many strigoi in one night. I was kind of awed myself, never before had I heard of so many killings in one night. She continued with the story. When she and the other guardians had killed the remaining strigoi, they'd discovered two moroi had been taken from the party. Such an act wasn't uncommon for strigoi. Sometimes they wanted to save the moroi for a later "snack"; sometimes lower ranking strigoi were dispatched by more powerful ones to bring back prey. Regardless, two moroi were gone form the ball, and their guardian had been injured. "Naturally we couldn't leave those moroi in strigoi clutches." She said. "We tracked the strgoi to their hideout and found several of them living together. I'm sure you can recognize how rare that is." And it was. Strigoi had an evil and selfish nature, which made them turn against each other very easily. Organizing for attacks-when they had an immediate and bloody goal in mind-was the best they could do. But living together? It was almost impossible to imagine. She went on telling hoe she got capture but managed to escape and rescue the prisoners. In doing so, she performed what had to be the hat trick of the century, killing strigoi in all three ways: staking, decapitation, and setting them on fire. The class was in awe as she spoke. Mouths gaping open, eyes bulging out of their skulls and not a sound to be heard. Rose glanced around the frozen classroom. Seeming ultimately bored out of her mind. When Janine had finished more than a dozen hands flew up into the air. And questions came pouring out. About the tenth questions Rose's hand went up into the air. I silently pleaded her not to start anything. Although I knew she wouldn't listen, even if she could read my mind. It took Janine a while to notice and call on Rose. She was a little astonished to find Rose amongst the class, as if she never saw her. But I know with enough training and experience that that wasn't the case. Dhampir's are trained to examine every room very closely and know every detail.**

"**So, Guardian Hathaway." Rose began. Oh boy. "Why didn't you guys just secure the place?"**

**Janine frowned. "What do you mean?" It was amazing looking at these, mother and daughter, side by side. They were nothing alike. Save for the same dark eyes. With Rose's dark long flowing hair, and Janine's short red hair. Their heights contrasted a lot and their attitudes especially.**

**Rose shrugged, slouching back into her desk. "I don't know. It seems to me like you guys messed up. Why didn't you scope out the place and make sure it was clear of strigoi in the first place? Seems like you could have saved yourself a lot of trouble."**

**I could see everyone's eyes and attention shift to Rose. "If we hadn't gone through all that "trouble" there'd be seven more strigoi walking the world, and those other captured moroi would be dead or turned by now."**

"**Yeah, yeah, I get how you guys saved the day and all that, but I'm going back to the principles here. I mean, this is a theory class right?" Her head moved in Stan's direction, who was regarding Rose with a very stormy look. "So I just want to figure out what went wrong in the beginning." Rose's attention turned back on her mother.**

"**It's not that simple." Janine replied. "The venue had an extremely complex layout. We went through it initially and found nothing. It's believed the strigoi came in after the festivities had started-or that there might have been passages and hidden rooms that we hadn't been aware of." The class ooh'ed and ahh'ed over the idea of secret passages. But I could tell Rose wasn't even the slightest bit impressed. **

"**So what you're saying is that you guys either failed to detect them during your first sweep, or they broke through the "security" you set up during the party. Seems like someone messed up either way."**

**The tightness in Janine's lips increased and when she spoke her voice had a frosty edge to it. "We did the best we could with an unusual situation. I can see how someone at your level might not be able to grasp the intricacies of what I'm describing, but once you've actually learned enough to go beyond theory, you'll see how different it is when you're actually out there and lives are in your hands."**

"**No doubt." Rose agreed. "Who am I to question your methods? I mean, whatever gets you the molnija marks, right?" I stared at Rose then, really stared at her. I knew she didn't like her mother that much, but to shun her in front of the entire class with adults present? That was way out of line. And I couldn't see how she could single out her mother like that.**

"Little Dhampir," Adrian began. "You were really mad in this book. Like all the time and it wasn't even spirit darkness most of the time."

"Rose is always mad about something." Mia stated. Rose was just sitting there not saying anything.

"Yeah, but usually that's like an "I'm irritated with you, please shut up" kind of mad, this was more a "I'm being irrational and I want to hurt everyone" kind of mad." Adrian argued.

My mother blew up then, her face was furious. "Well can you blame her? All of the people close to her couldn't give a damn about what was going on with her and how she was feeling. Lissa was ignoring her for Christian, Mia was still a bitch back then, Christian was just being a smartass, her mother was only there to make her feel like a child, Tasha was stealing the only person she loved, Adrian was there but he was just stalking her and making her uncomfortable, and worst of all you." She pointed at me, her glare burning holes in me. "You, the person who supposedly loved her were just spending all this time moping and trying to get away from her. With barely any concern about how she felt and how she was doing. You avoided her at all costs; you hurt her every time you spoke. Ugh! You should be ashamed of yourselves. All of you." She sat back down and folded her arms across her chest. She was right though, we all completely take Rose for granted. She's always there for us but we don't take the time to be there for her. I glanced at her and was shocked to see a tear running down her face. I brushed it away with a kiss.

"I'm so sorry, Roza. You know that I love you more than anything. I was just being an idiotic asshole back then." I murmured to her. She turned around quickly to look at me.

"No, no." She shook her head. "Don't feel bad, I was a bitch back then too. I don't blame you for any of that. I love you." I gave her a small smile, still berating myself internally. Everyone else looked ashamed too, well except for Tasha. She was grinning.

"Well if that lovely moment is over I think I'll keep reading now." We nodded at her to continue.

"**Miss Hathaway." Stan's deep voice rumbled through the room. "Please take your things and go wait outside for the remainder of the class."**

**Rose turned to him. "Are you serious? Since when is there anything wrong with asking questions?"**

"**Your attitude is what's wrong." He pointed to the door. "Go." A silence heavier and deeper than when Janine told her story descended over everyone. Slinging her backpack over her shoulder, she crossed the short distance to the door refusing to make eye contact with her mother as she stalked out of the classroom. The remainder of the period consisted of students asking questions and guardians answering them. I was surprised to hear some of the school's guardians speak up and ask their questions. I stayed silent, thinking of how much trouble Rose was going to be in with Janine. No one I knew had the courage to stand up to her that way. I was even afraid of her.**

"Are you still afraid of me, Belikov?" Janine asked.

I shrugged. "A little." More like a lot. Janine smiled at me.

"Good."

**Five minutes before class ended Janine excused herself from the room. I wouldn't doubt that it was to talk to Rose. I stretched my hearing to the door, hoping to catch somewhat of their conversation. At first their voices were calm and stern. But towards the end of the conversation their voices-mainly Rose's-rose to a shout. I flinched, it was one thing to yell at Rose, and another to be Janine Hathaway and yell at her. The bell rung then, I took my time getting out of the classroom. Knowing one of Rose's friends would comfort her, in some way.**

"Nope not really." Rose whispered in a pain filled voice. I felt wretched all over again.

**I knew I couldn't knew I shouldn't even think about it, but there it was. The feeling of wanting to pull her into my arms and whisper that everything will be alright. I pushed that painful image away. Repeating over and over as I made my way to the gym, it's the right thing.**

My mother, my grandmother, and Viktoria were all glaring at me. "What?" I asked.

My mother answered in Russian. "You are lucky that you are a grown man or else I would be whipping your ass right now. I taught you better manners than that!"

I started to respond but Vika threw up a hand to stop me. "No, Dimitri. I love Roza like a sister and I once did something to hurt her too so I understand how it happens. But I didn't know Rose as well as you do, how could you knowingly put her through so much pain?" Wait what did Vika do to Rose? I shook that thought away.

"I know, I know. I don't even remember what was going through my head at the time besides wanting to do what's right." I said softly, hoping they would believe me.

"Well good thing this book is going to remind all of us of what was going through your head, boy." Yeva muttered. Momma just kept glaring while everyone around us was staring at the exchange curiously. Well except Sydney who understood what was going on and seemed to agree with it.

"What are you talking about?"Rose asked timidly, having heard her name in the conversation.

"Nothing, love. There were just giving me some well-earned chastising."

"Oh." Rose looked around. "Please don't yell at him, it's all my fault really. If I hadn't been so immature than he wouldn't feel this way." I was shocked, this wasn't Rose's fault.

"No Roza. This is my burden to carry." She looked like she wanted to argue but I cut her off with a kiss.

"So.." Tasha drawled. "Who wants to read next?"

"I will."

Chapter 5

**When training with Rose finally came she practically ran up to the practice dummy. With a curled fist she slapped it's chest, slightly left of the center. Right above the heart. "There." She told me. "The heart is there, and the sternum and ribs are in the way. Can I have the stake now?"**

**She crossed her arms as she looked up at me triumphantly, waiting for my reply. Instead of answering I simply nodded in acknowledgment. Looking at her this way made me think of what happened in Stan's class. Although I didn't want to mention it, I was afraid I'd upset her. "And how do you get through the sternum and the ribs?" I asked. With a sigh she answered. Not surprised that I asked he more after that. She knew me by now. We spent a large part of the practice going over that, and I demonstrated several techniques that would yield the quickest kill. Finally after an hours' worth of demonstrating I extended my hand and offered the stake to her. I thought she would rip it out of my hand like a starved bear, but she didn't. She just simply stared at it.**

"**You're giving it to me?"**

"**I can't believe you're holding back. I figured you'd have taken it and run by now." I said**

"**Aren't you always teaching me to hold back?" She asked.**

"**Not one everything."**

"**But on some things."**

**I simply stared at her. After all this time of building up a wall between us I forgot what it felt like to look at her in a romantic sort of way.**

"Wait," Rose cut in. "You did?" She cleared her throat self-consciously. "I never stopped."

"I didn't either. I was just lying to myself." I whispered into her ear, praying that she would believe me. She didn't say anything more.

**And looking at her now, I knew her slip was just as surprising to her as it was to me. What had gone between us had been powerful and lustful. And some part of me didn't want to let that go. While the other part screamed at the other to do the right thing. And I was struggling to keep myself in control as well as Rose. One slip up like that could turn into something else. And that would be bad. "Of course." I said in a cool tone, keeping my guardian face on. There was no way I was going to show any romantic emotion towards Rose. Because that slip up from her will mostly definitely turn into something else. **

"You can show romantic feelings towards me, hot stuff." Tasha called from the corner. Rose glowered at her.

"Never in a million years, Tasha." I responded icily.

"**It's like everything else. Balance. Know which things to run forward with- and know which to leave alone." I purposely placed heavy emphasis on the last statement. Our eyes met briefly. And in that small moment I saw her light up, as if she understood that I did understand what she was talking about. But I simply ignored it because I was her teacher and that's what I was supposed to do. With a sigh she stared down at the weapon, considering whether or not to take it. Finallly she reached out and curled her bony fingers around the hilt. She stared down at trailing her long fingers over its surface. Feeling the glass-like texture that it was made out of. She lifted it from my hand and brought it to her, taking a long time to study it and get used to its weight. She looked down at the stake as if it held all the answers in the world. And then surprised me even more when she looked up at me.**

"**What should I do first?" I covered the basics, honing the way she held and moved with the stake. Later on, I finally let her attack one of the dummies, and the way she struggled I knew she thought it was harder than it looked. And through it all I gave her patience sitting back and guiding her through the maneuvers and motions on staking.**

"**Slide it up through the ribs." I explained, as I watched her try to fit the stake's point through a gap in the bones. "It'll be easier since you're shorter than most of your attackers. Plus, you can slide along the lower rib's edge." When practice ended, I took the stake back and nodded in approval. "Good. Very good."**

**She glanced at me in surprise. "Really?"**

"**You do it like you've been doing it for years." And that was true. Never before had I seen someone as young as Rose take on the dummies like that. She attacked them as if they were real strigoi. She smiled as we walked side by side out of the practice room. When we neared the door Rose's pretty smile disappeared, into a scowl.**

"**Can I stake that one next time?"**

**I picked my coat and put it on. I followed her gaze and saw that she was having a stare down with the dummy with red curly hair. Instantly reminding me of Janine. "I don't think that'd be healthy." I said.**

"**It'd be better than me actually doing it to her," Rose grumbled, slinging her backpack over one shoulder. We headed out to the gym.**

"**Violence isn't the answer to your problems." I said.**

"**She's the one with the problem. And I thought the whole point of my education was that violence is the answer."**

"**Only to those who bring it to you first. Your mother isn't assaulting you. You two are just too much alike, that's all."**

**Rose stopped walking at that. "I'm not anything like her! I mean..we kind of have the same eyes. But I'm a lot taller. And my hair's completely different." She pointed to her ponytail indicating that her thick black-brown locks were contrasted to her mother's auburn curls.**

"**I'm not talking about you appearances and you know it." **

**She looked away from me. "You think I'm jealous?"**

"**Are you?" I asked. "If so, what are you jealous of exactly?"**

**She glanced back up at me. "I don't know. Maybe I'm jealous of her reputation. Maybe I'm jealous because she's put more time into her reputation that into me. I don't know."**

"**You don't think what she did was great?"**

"**Yes. No. I don't know. It just sounded like such a …I don't know…like she was bragging. Like she did it for the glory." She grimaced. "For the marks." The marks, could only mean one thing. Molnija marks. Which were tattoos awarded to guardians when they killed strigoi. Each one looked like a tiny x made of lightning bolts. They went on the backs of our necks and showed how experienced a guardian was.**

"**You think facing down strigoi is worth a few marks? I thought you'd learned something from the Badica house."**

"**That's not what I-"**

"**Come on."**

**She stopped walking. "What?"**

"**That not all marks are badges of honor."**

"Well I have a feeling I'm about to be introduced." Tasha said happily. "That's just great, so now I, and everyone else hear especially Rose, can hear about how special I am to Dimka." She winked at me. Oh god, this is the part I've been dreading. Rose is going to murder me, but she'll probably have to get in line after my mother, my grandmother, Vika, and Janine. OH GOD! I just glared at Tasha but I noticed that Rose didn't look angry (yet), she looked like she did when she was doing a particularly hard math problem.

"Oh shut it Tasha." Christian said. "No one wants to hear about how you seduced Dimitri into thinking you were not a psychopath." Tasha sobered at that.

"Do you really hate me so much Christian?" She wondered.

"Um yeah. You tried to kill my girlfriend and one of my best friends." She pouted for a moment but didn't protest against the charges. "I think I'll read next."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 6

**Rose followed me obediently. I led her towards the boundaries of the campus and into the surrounding woods. The Academy owned a lot of land, and not all of it had been used for educational purposes. We were in a remote part of Montana, and at times, it seemed that the school was just barely holding back the wilderness. We walked quietly for awhile, our feet crunching through the thick, unbroken snow. A few birds flitted by, singing their greetings to the rising sun. And at time like this, where wilderness was all you could hear, was the best thing in the world. And I found myself relaxing as I led her further into the woods. Rose's crunching feet staggering was the only sound, other than nature, and her irregular stride told me that she was trying hard to keep up with my more normal and longer one.**

"Dimitri?" Vika asked.

"Hmm?"

"Why didn't you slow down dammit?"

I opened my mouth and Rose intervened. "Hey hey, lay off Dimitri for a bit." Vika rolled her eyes and I turned to look at Christian, begging him to keep reading. He got the message and began again.

**Ahead was the old watch post, it's small dark shape came into view as we approached it. It was more of an old cabin, made out of logs. Yet overtime the logs had become worn and rotten in some places. The roof sagged a little. "What is that?" Rose asked.**

"**Old watch-post." I said. "Guardians used to live on the edge of campus and keep watch for strigoi."**

"**Why don't they anymore?"**

"**We don't have enough guardians to staff it. Besides, moroi have warded campus with enough protective magic that most don't think it's necessary to have actual people on guard." Provided no humans staked the wards. I was about to turn her away from the sad looming building when I heard voices on the opposite side of the building. Curious Rose and I rounded the corner of the building, coming up on a surprising scene. A small frozen pond lay there, and Christian and Lissa were ice skating on it. A women that looked oddly familiar was with them, her back to us. As the women skated a wave of jet black hair followed her, and it was then that I realized that it was Tasha Ozera, as she skated to a graceful stop. Her hair arced around her. I couldn't recall the last time I had seen Tasha, it had felt like ages. And seeing her now brought back good memories. And I tried my best to hide a smile that was curving at my lips. **

**Lissa grinned when she saw Rose standing next to me. "Rose!" Christian glanced over at Rose as she spoke, not too happy to see us. As if we ruined some romantic getaway. Lissa moved in awkward strides to the pond's edge. She obviously wasn't so adept at skating. **

**I could see Rose's body stiffen at my side. Her voice full of jealousy when she spoke. "Thanks for inviting me to the party."**

"**I figured you were busy." Lissa said. "And this is secret anyway. We aren't supposed to be here."**

**Christian skated up beside her, with Tasha in tow. "You bringing the party crashers, Dimka?" She asked looking at me for the first time. Her eyes, that resembled Christians so much, as well as her hair, were the only things that made her and Christian distinguishable. And the purple scar on the left side of her face was exactly as I remembered it, purple and raised; and looked as if someone had bitten into it and ripped off her flesh. Which was exactly what happened. **

**I laughed at her old Russian nickname for me. Which only brought back wonderful, sweet memories.**

Rose slipped off my lap and sat next to me, still close and still sharing a blanket with me. But not as close as before. I saw her close her eyes as she continued listening, as if bracing herself. I wrapped my arm around her waist, not letting her move any farther away from me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Tasha grinning.

"**It's impossible to keep Rose away from places she shouldn't be. She always finds them eventually." Tasha grinned and turned around, flipping her long hair over one shoulder. I could see Rose stiffen as she took in Tasha's scar. And I hoped that Tasha didn't notice Rose staring at her. I silently wished Rose would find respect and not stare. But Rose was Rose and there was no changing that**.

Rose looked proud and offended at the same time. "I have respect." She said stoutly.

"I know Roza, I know." I assured her.

**Tasha was Christian's aunt. When his parents had turned strigoi, they'd come back for him, hoping to hide him away and turn him strigoi when he was older. Tasha had fended them off, taking a nasty battle wound in return. She had saved Christian by providing enough distraction until the guardians showed up. Tasha extended her gloved hand out to Rose. "Tasha Ozera," She said. "I've heard a lot about you, Rose." I caught Rose glaring at Christian. Tasha saw this and laughed. "Don't worry, it was all good."**

"**No it wasn't." Christian countered.**

**Tasha shook her head in exasperation. "Honestly, I don't know where he got such horrible social skills. He didn't learn them from me."**

"**What are you guys doing out here?" Rose asked.**

"**I wanted to spend some time with these two." A small frown wrinkled her forehead. "But I don't really like hanging around the school itself. They aren't always hospitable.." Normally, school officials fell all over themselves whenever royals came to visit. But because Lucas and Moira had decided to turn strigoi, the moroi world hadn't been too kind whenever the Ozeras were around.**

"**Because..because of what happened." Rose said.**

**Tasha shrugged it off. "That's the way it is." She rubbed her hands together and exhaled, her breath making a frosty cloud in the air. "But let's not stand out here, not when we can build a fire inside." I led them all into the cabin, Rose was the last one to arrive inside. The cabin was bare, covered in layers of dust and dirt. It consisted of only one room. There was a narrow bed with no covers in the corner and a few shelves where food had once been stored. There was a fireplace, and after a few moments Tasha had lit the logs, and we had a blaze going that warmed the small area. The five of us sat down, huddling around its head, Tasha then produced a bag of marshmallows that we cooked over the flames. Tasha always had a kind and loving heart, always caring about others before and never for herself. She has been like that since the first time I met her. As we feasted, Lissa and Christian talked to each other in an easy, comfortable way they always had. And although I wanted to deny it, in the back of my mind I found myself wishing that Rose and I could do that.**

"We can now." I said happily, smiling at Rose. She smiled back at me but it was a distracted smile.

**Where we could just sit down and talk and not worry about our complicated love life. But life wasn't that easy when you were a dhampir. To get my mind off Rose I turned to Tasha, talking to her in the same familiar light way. She was always easy to talk to, and made me feel like an equal rather than someone lower than her. I relaxed minute by minute finding myself familiar with Tasha. She was the only one who made life seem easy, with that laid back air of hers. And in no time I found myself laughing and smiling more than I have in a long time.**

"Liss,"Rose interrupted. "Can I talk to you in the other room, please?" Her voice was light but emotionless.

"Sure, Rose." Lissa responded, looking at her worriedly. They both stood up.

"Be right back." They left the room, I watched the door they went through worriedly. As did Christian, I couldn't hear what they were saying but Rose's voice sounded slightly muffled. Tasha was looking extremely pleased with the situation at hand while most of the others were just looking uncomfortable. I sighed and put my head in my hands, a second later I felt a hand on my cheek. Rose. "What's wrong, Comrade?" She questioned.

"Rose are you okay? Are you sure you want to listen to this?" I asked her intensely. She gave me a knowing look.

"Of course, Dimitri. I'm fine. It wasn't that at all, promise." She said reassuringly, I wasn't sure I believed her but I nodded anyway.

"Well isn't that a touching moment. I just wanted to say thank you for your kind words, Dimitri. Hearing that you actually felt something for me just warms my heart." Rose stiffened at that and I wrapped my arms around her protectively.

"I love you, milaya. Only you." She relaxed and whispered the same back to me.

**We had been catching up with each other. Talking about our busy lives. After a while into our conversation Rose interrupted. "So are you coming on the ski trip?"**

**Tasha nodded. Stifling a yawn, she stretched herself out like a cat. "I haven't been skiing in ages. No time. Been saving all my vacation for this."**

"**Vacation?" Rose gave her a curious look. "Do you have…a job?"**

"**Sadly, yes." Tasha said, though I knew she wasn't sad about it at all. "I teach martial arts classes." Rose stared at Tasha in astonishment. I knew why she had caught a sudden interest in martial arts was because of what happened with Christian's parents. A lot of royals didn't work at all, and if they did, it was for some investment or other moneymaking business that furthered their family fortunes. And those who did work certainly didn't do a lot of martial arts or physically demanding jobs.**

"**What do you think, Rose?" Christian seemed highly amused. "Think you could take her?"**

"**Hard to say." Rose said.**

**Tasha gave Rose a crooked grin. "You're being modest. I've seen what you guys can do. This is just a hobby I picked up."**

**I chuckled. "Now you're being modest. You could teach half the classes around here."**

"**Not likely." She said. "It'd be pretty embarrassing to be beaten up by a bunch of teenagers."**

"**I don't think that'd happen." I said. "I seem to remember you doing some damage to Neil Szelsky." I tried to lighten up her mood. I didn't like it when she put herself down occasionally. **

**To my disappointment she rolled her eyes. "Throwing my drink in his face wasn't actually damage-unless you consider the damage it did to his suit. And we all know how he is about his clothes." We both laughed at the private joke of when Neil overly obsessed when his clothes got wrinkled or weren't hung correctly in his closet. **

**Rose broke our laughter with: "Did you start learning to fight before or after that happened to your face?" I could feel shock rising up in my chest. I knew Rose had a lack of self-control every once in a while, but to have it in front of Tasha was embarrassing.**

I cringed at my past thoughts and squeezed Rose's waist.

"**Rose!" Lissa hissed, cutting off my attempts to scorn Rose for her rude comment. But as I glanced back at Tasha I was surprised to see her not even upset. And as my eyes moved towards Christian I noticed that the same expression had been placed upon his face as well. Tasha regarded Rose with a level, thoughtful look.**

"You know I hated you, even back then." Rose looked shocked. And I was furious; my Roza already had to listen to me pining over another woman while that woman was in the room making it worse. She shouldn't have to deal with Tasha insulting her also.

"Why?" Rose whispered. "You didn't even know then."

"I saw the way you looked at him from the very beginning, hell! The way you walked with him, almost protectively. And I would've been fine that his student had a crush on him if you didn't look like you, I mean I had heard that you were pretty but I thought it was in a teenager way. When you walked around the corner I realized you were pretty in a womanly way. And I wanted to kill you, which I almost did." She responded with a satisfied smile. Shock crossed Roza's face, same as the others. But I wasn't shocked, I was pissed.

"My Roza isn't merely pretty." I growled. "She's gorgeous. And if you ever, ever try to hurt her again, in _any_ way I will kill you myself." Roza looked at me, shocked. But I just pulled her tighter and kissed her on the head.

"I second that." Everyone in the room said besides Tasha and Roza. Tasha looked too shocked for words and I realized that this was the time to continue the book so I motioned for Christian to continue.

"**After." She said. She didn't lower her gaze or look embarrassed, though I sensed sadness coursing through her. "How much do you know?"**

**Rose glanced at Christian. "The basics."**

**She nodded. "I knew..I knew what Lucas and Moira had become, but that still didn't prepare me. Mentally, physically, or emotionally.**

"You did get that part right." Roza muttered, looking heartbroken. I could sense that she was reliving the time I was strigoi in her head.

"Shh Roza, don't think about that." I pulled her onto my lap and she buried her head into my chest.

"But I failed you, Comrade. You wanted me to kill you and I failed."

"No Roza, no. You were amazing, much better than me. I would've just holed myself up in my room and cried. I couldn't have hunted you like that." She looked up at me, eyes full of love. She opened her mouth to respond when a loud voice filled the room.

"DAMN RIGHT YOU FAILED. IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU DIMKA WOULD'VE BEEN IN MINNEAPOLIS WITH ME AND NOTHING WOULD'VE HAPPENED TO HIM." She fumed. "ALL THIS GUILT HE FEELS ABOUT BEING STRGOI, IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! HE WOULD'VE BEEN SAFE, HE WOULD'VE HAD A HAPPY LIFE WITH _CHILDREN_." She sneered the last word. "That's not something you could ever give him, you selfish bitch." I was stunned, to stunned to move. But Rose wasn't.

"Oh god." She moaned in a pain filled voice right before she ran out of the room. I immediately ran after her, slipping into the room just before it slammed shut. And Rose was there, on the floor. Shaking.

"Roza? Don't believe a word she says. It wasn't your fault, it was mine. You know that." She just shook her head. I sat down on the floor and pulled her towards me. "Milaya, sweetheart. Don't cry, please don't cry, Roza. It breaks my heart when you cry." She pulled herself together after a few minutes of me holding her and whispering in her ear.

She grabbed my face with both of her hands and looked me in the eye. "I love you more than anything in world. More than my own life. If there was any way to go back and save you from that I would. Even if it meant I couldn't have you." She was serious, completely serious. But I wasn't having it.

"Roza no. I wouldn't give you up even if it meant that I didn't turn stigoi. You are my life and my heart. You are worth it." I pressed a light kiss to her lips and stood up. Holding her in my arms. "Now c'mon, we have to finish these books so we can get out of here and have some alone time." I waggled eyebrows suggestively. She chuckled under her breath and nodded. I walked back in the room, nodding at Janine and Abe who were staring at Rose worriedly. I sat back down on the couch, keeping her in my arms. Christian started up from where we left off.

"**I think if I had to live through it again, I still wouldn't be ready. But after that night, I looked at myself-figuratively-and realized how defenseless I was. I'd spent my whole life expecting guardians to protect me and take care of me. And that's not to say the guardians aren't capable. Like I said, you could probably take me in a fight. But they-Lucas and Moira-cut down our two guardians before we realized what had happened. I stalled them from taking Christian-but just barely. If the others hadn't shown up, I'd be dead and he'd-" She stopped frowning, and kept going. "I decided that I didn't want to die that way, not without putting up a real fight and doing everything I could to protect myself and those that I love. So I learned all sorts of self-defense. And after a while, I didn't really, uh, fit in so well with high society around here. So I moved to Minneapolis and made a living from teaching others." Silence fell. But only for a moment before Tasha's light mood returned as she told us all funny stories. I knew a lot of people she spoke of as well. Some of them I hadn't heard of, but most I went to school with or worked with. We were all in hysterics until Tasha looked at her watch. "Where's the best place a girl can go shopping around here?" She asked**

**Lissa and Rose exchanged looks. "Missoula." They said in unison.**

**Tasha sighed at this. "That's a couple hour away, but if I leave soon, I can probably still get in before the stores close. I'm hopelessly behind in Christmas shopping."**

**Rose groaned. "I'd kill to go shopping."**

"**Me too." Lissa chimed in.**

"**Maybe we could sneak along.." Rose gave me a hopeful look.**

"**No." I said immediately. I wasn't going to get in trouble for letting her go on some shopping spree. She gave a sigh.**

"I actually wanted to get you a Christmas present, Comrade." Roza whispered to me. "And I actually managed to get one, with Alberta's help. But with everything that was going on I didn't think you'd want it." She shrugged sheepishly. I was astounded, my Roza was thinking of me so much even back then?

"Oh, milaya. I would've loved it." I assured her.

"I still have it." She whispered shyly. "I could have one of Tasha's guardians get it." She glanced at me. "If you want."

"I would love that, my Roza." Wondering what about this present could make Rose act to timid. She nodded at me gratefully and turned to ask the guardian if he would go get it. He agreed only after arming Rose with a gun to protect herself against Tasha.

"Read, Sparky." She commanded. I was still thinking about the gift Roza was going to give me, when she nudged my side and I tuned back in I realized that I had missed a couple sentences.

**And then it clicked. The problem-the reason-why I couldn't forget Rose or my feelings for her was because I wasn't trying hard enough. If I could actually try to date someone else, or even try to flirt with someone else, maybe…just maybe, I could forget Rose and find someone else.**

Rose gasped quietly, and I hugged her tightly. Whispering "Never." in her ear.

**I glanced over at Tasha. "Want me to go with you?"**

"**And keep you up all night?" Tasha shook her head, locking her blue gaze on mine. "I wouldn't do that to you Dimka."**

"**He doesn't mind." Rose said quickly and excitedly. I was amused by how she had suddenly jumped in. I would have thought her to be jealous. If Rose continued to act this way around Tasha then I could definitely give my theory a try.**

"If I knew that then I wouldn't have told you to go. And I definitely would've been jealous." Rose said darkly, then as if realizing what she had just blurted out she mumbled. "Sorry."

I just chuckled. "Don't be sorry, I was jealous all throughout these first few books. I still get pissed at the guys that check you out everyday." I really hated the way that most of the male guardians that worked with _my_ Roza everyday looked at her.

She glanced at me in surprise. "What are you talking about?"

"You don't notice."

"Nope." She said, popping the p. "Plus why would I care? I have you." She hugs me tightly and love floods my body, making me feel breathless.

"And more importantly, I have you."

"Read Christian, before I barf." Tasha cut in rudely. I glared at her but Roza let out a content sigh and I couldn't stop the smile that spread across my face at the sound.

"**I really don't." I replied.**

**Tasha hesitated. "All right. But we should probably go soon." Our party dispersed shortly after that. The moroi going one direction while Rose and I went the other. I had made plans with Tasha to meet up in half an hour. I had to know what Rose truly thought of Tasha. I didn't want to hurt her, I knew it had to be done, but as of right now I just couldn't bring myself to.**

"**So what do you think of her?" I asked when we were alone.**

"**I like her. She's cool." She stopped, face thoughtful. "And I get what you mean about the marks."**

"**Oh?"**

**Rose nodded. Watching her footing as we walked along the paths. They tended to sneak a patch of ice now and then. Even when shoveled and salted. "She didn't do what she did for glory. She did it because she had to. Just like..just like my mom did. The marks don't matter. Molnijas or scars."**

"**You're a fast learner." I said with approval.**

"**Why does she call you Dimka?"**

**I laughed softly. "It's a nickname for Dimitri."**

"**That doesn't make any sense. It doesn't sound anything like Dimitri. You should be called, I don't know, Dimi or something."**

"**That's not how it works in Russian." I said.**

"**Russian's weird."**

"**So is English."**

**She gave me a sly look. "If you'd teach me to swear in Russian, I might have a new appreciation for it."**

"**You swear too much already."**

"**I just want to express myself."**

"**Oh Roza…" I sighed. "You express yourself more than anyone else I know." She smiled as we walked on a bit without saying anything else.**

**We walked in silence for a few minutes before she said. "You know, there's something funny about Tasha's scars."**

"**What's that?" I asked.**

"**The scars…they mess up her face." She began slowly, as if to choose her words wisely. I was proud of her for trying. "I mean, it's obvious she used to be really pretty. But even with the scars now…I don't know. She's pretty in a different way. It's like…like they're part of her. They complete her." I didn't say anything, but gave her a sidelong glance. She returned it, and as our eyes met, I felt the briefest moments of the old-**

Rose raised her eyebrows at the word 'old'.

**attraction. I still wanted her, so badly that it hurt. I had never felt like this. She was the only girl to make my chest tighten, and my heart beat faster whenever I saw her. I put my guardian face back on, hoping to show her only pride and approval. **

**Trying to forget her was going to be the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life. And I knew, I would die a little everyday. "You're a fast learner, Roza."**

I was blushing like hell. God having my thoughts read aloud was terrible. Rose was chuckling but she also seemed a little subdued.

"Good that's over." Sydney said. Talking for the first time in a while. Everyone else also came out of their stupor. I guess they realized that annoying comments were not going to be a good idea in this book. I agreed, Rose already looked upset. Sydney yawned. "Let's go to bed." We all agreed, mumbling our 'good nights' as we shuffled over to our beds. Tasha's guardian stood up to take her back to her cell. Once Roza and I were in our bed I wrapped my arms around her, holding her tightly to my chest. I chuckled seeing that she looked like she was almost asleep already. I started nodding off until I heard my Roza speak.

"I love you, Dimitri. Forever." She mumbled. I'm pretty sure she was sleep talking and the fact that her last thoughts before sleep were of me made me smile.

I leaned down and whispered in her ear. "I love you more, my beautiful Roza. Sleep my only love." Her content sigh was the last thing I heard before I fell asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

I woke up last the next morning, Rose was still in the room but she was getting dressed. She heard me stir.

"Hey, sleepyhead." She teased. "Everyone's waiting for you to get up so they could keep reading but I told them to let you have your sleep." At that I jumped out of bed and started pulling on my clothes.

"I don't want to hold everyone up, and I'm not hungry so we can just get right to it." She grinned at me and pulled me out the door and onto the couch before pushing me down and sitting on my lap. I caught a glimpse of a rather large box on the table wrapped in worn down wrapping paper with cowboys on it. I guessed that it was my present, but I would wait until Roza wanted to show me it.

"Who's reading?" Yeva asked. No one responded. "Then I'll do it." It hit me then what chapter this was. I buried my face in Roza's beautiful hair.

**Chapter 7**

**Half an hour later I met Tasha at the front of the school. As I got closer I noticed that she was standing in front of a Honda Civic, I knew it would just her and I today, since all of the extra had "plans". As I approached I have her one of my warm smiles. She returned it.**

It seemed like Rose was having a little trouble breathing. I rubbed her back soothingly, hoping that this wouldn't hurt as much as I thought.

"Oh it will." Yeva said to me, somehow knowing what I just thought. Everyone looked at her curiously but she ignored them and kept reading.

"**So it's just me and you Dimka?" Tasha asked, although I knew she wasn't surprised.**

**I nodded. "The extra guardians couldn't make it."**

**Tasha let out a heavy sigh. "I'm not surprised, most moroi and guardians don't like me." Tasha looked back up at me and gave me a reassuring smile. "But let's not let that get in the way of our day together." Tasha threw me the keys. I walked over to the passenger door and opened it up for her. She stepped inside the vehicle. And when she had buckled her seatbelt I shut the door and walked around the front end of the car. The sky was a pink orange color, indicating that it was now dawn. The birds in the tall dark trees surrounding us were chirping loudly. Singing their morning songs. We rode in silence for a while. Even though I didn't show it, I was really tired. The human schedule had messed up my moroi one. And seeing Tasha yawn made me realize that I wasn't the only one that was sleep deprived.**

"I wouldn't have minded if we slept together instead of going to the mall." Rose had the strangest look on her face. It looked like she was amused, angry, and in pain at the same time. I did not like the look, even though she was adorably gorgeous with a pout on her face I never want her to be upset. But before I could tell Tasha to shut up Vika spoke up.

"Okay you, I used to really admire you, but you can literally see that my brother is happy right now. And if you really loved him then you wouldn't want to ruin his happiness. Or make Rose upset which just makes Dimitri upset by default." She stood directly in front of Tasha with her hands on her hips. "And me. Because a lot of people in this room have caused Rose pain, including me, but she doesn't deserve it. So make Rose upset and I will slap you so hard you'd think I did it with a butter sock." I was stunned, butter sock? Whatever. But more importantly…

"Vika?" She turned to me. "What the hell did you do to Roza?" She promptly turned red and turned to Rose for help. But Rose looked like she was going to cry. I started rubbing soothing patterns on her back. I would've dropped the conversation to comfort her but this was about someone (even if it was Vika) causing my Roza pain. I had to know. "Vika?" I prompted.

She sighed. "Alright but just don't kill me." I glared at her, not making that promise. She sighed again. "Well you might as well now." She began but Roza interrupted.

"Viktoria its okay, you don't have to."

She frowned. "No Rose I do. I deserve for him to be upset with me about this." She turned to face me. "You know that Rose stayed with us in Russia when you were Strigoi?" I nodded. "Well during that time Rose and I got really close. I told her about this moroi guy that I really liked and thought liked me too. She and I talked about it about but she didn't think that he was one of _those_ moroi guys. On second thought neither did I. Anyway the day before I left to go back to school he said he wanted to hang out with me before I left. I wanted to hang with Rose too because I would be leaving the next day until the next holiday. So I brought Rose with me and when we went in Rose immediately realized that we were in a blood whore house. She begged me to go home with her, claiming that Rolan had made a pass at her too when she had asked him to spare me, that he would just use me and that she didn't want me to get hurt. I brushed her off and sent her home without me. Well when she got outside she made a deal with Abe to leave Baia if he saved me from Rolan. It worked but I was super pissed at Rose, I thought she was jealous, I accused her being a whore and never loving you." Roza flinched in my arms and I hugged her tighter. "I told her that she knew nothing about love. She tried to explain to me, about him using him and getting Sonya pregnant but I didn't believe her. When we got home she tried again but I just told her that she shouldn't try to protect me because she would never be anything close to you and that I didn't think of her as a sister at all. Also that she would never be a part of this family, oh and I told her to go away. I didn't really mean it but the next day she was gone without even saying goodbye." Vika concluded breathlessly. To say I was pissed was an understatement, but I wasn't going to fight with Viktoria while Roza was so obviously upset. I cradled her in my arms and shot Vika a look that clearly said 'we'll talk about this later'.

"Roza? Roza its okay, it's in the past. I'm here now, I'll always be here."

"I know." She mumbled into my chest. "I just don't like thinking about when you were gone."

"Don't milaya." She nodded. "Yeva can you please keep reading?" She complied.

**After a while Tasha spoke. "So how have you been Dimka?" She asked, mid-yawn.**

**I smiled and glanced over at her. "Good, I miss the action, but it's nice to be a guardian at the Academy." Which was true, although I wouldn't come close to mentioning Rose.**

**That thought ended all too quickly. "I bet especially with Rose as your student. She seems like the fast learning type." Tasha said as we continued on our path in the dimly lit forest.**

**I managed a shrug. "Yeah, but you haven't seen her bad side. She can be…a hothead."**

Mama hasn't stopped glaring at me yet. But Rose just shrugged. "It's true."

**Tasha looked over at me, and I returned her gaze. "Well isn't that a good thing? Wouldn't that make her fight better? When my students are slacking in my class I make them think of something that aggravates them."**

**Combat classes were one of the many things Tasha and I had in common.**

Roza squirmed in her seat, looking guilty. I had no idea what she was guilty of but I nevertheless pulled her into my lap and wrapped my arms around her tightly.

"**I suppose so. But Rose….well she's not someone you want to piss off. She's scary when she's in a bad mood."**

**Tasha laughed that familiar laugh that I was so used to. "Oh is the big bad Dimitri afraid of a teenage girl?" She said smiling wide.**

"Psychopath." Christian coughed.

"Bitch." Viktoria snorted at the same time. They glanced at each other, surprised. I expected a witty comment out of Rose but she just said.

"Babushka can you keep reading? I really want to know what happens next." My heart literally sunk when she said that, she _so_ did not want to hear it. I brooded on this before tuning back in to Babushka, surprised to find that I missed quite a bit during my brooding.

"**Tasha."**

"**Hmm?" She mumbled.**

"**Wake up, we're here."**

**She rubbed at her eyes and blinked against the sunlight, even with the windows deeply tinted. Moroi still were sensitive to the light. Sitting up she pulled down the visor to glance at herself in the mirror. "My god..I look horrible." She said as she ran a hand through her tangled and matted hair.**

**I tried to hide my smile. "You look great."**

Rose was way past tense by now. Mama could tell, she was alternating between glaring at me and glancing worriedly at Rose. "Roza.." She started. "Come sit with me and Vika will you?" Rose looked startled and I didn't want to let her go.

But she pushed herself up, mumbling. "Of course, Olena." I glared at my mother who just sent me a satisfied smirk back as Rose relaxed between my mother and sister. Yeva didn't speak at all, she just kept reading.

**She rolled her eyes. "Don't be modest." I pulled into the closest parking space. I was surprised at how many cars were in the lot. Considering how early it was.**

"Silly Dimka, It's never too early for shopping." Vika said teasingly, I mock glared at her but I was actually relived that she stopped glaring at me. Maybe they wouldn't be _too_ mad. I caught my mother's glare, nah nevermind.

**I turned off the car and walked around to open her door. It was cold as the chilly wind picked up. Tasha shivered as she stepped out of the car. Looking down I noticed her outfit for the first time. Pants and a thin sleeveless top. Feeling sympathy I took off my duster and draped it around her shoulders.**

I looked up at Rose, studying her face. I know how much Rose loves that I always give her my duster to wear and was worried that she would be bothered that I gave it to Tasha too. Then I scolded myself. Why am I so worried? Roza knows I love her, she won't be upset about this one little thing. I looked up again, Rose's face was blank but she was nodding to something that Vika was saying in her ear. I sighed and she looked up and flashed me a tight smile.

**She looked up at me and smiled. "Thanks Dimka." She said. And as I looked into her eyes I could make out a hint of the old attraction from years ago. My mind flashed back to the time when I had kissed her. I hadn't meant to, but I was curious and interested in her. Although it obviously hadn't worked out. It was nice and sweet.**

Rose was working very hard to seem care free and she probably did…to everyone else. But I could read her like a book. It was almost like she was tensing, preparing herself to take a hit. Vika wrapped her arms around Roza and pulled a blanket off the floor to wrap her in. She gave Vika a genuine smile and squeezed her hand. Oh how I want my Roza in my arms! As if she read my mind she told Vika something and then got up and walked towards me. I opened my arms to her and she plopped down onto my lap. I immediately wrapped my arms around her protectively and then buried my face in her hair. She leaned back into my chest and relaxed-slightly.

**And by looking into those blue eyes I could tell that she wasn't over me. Grabbing hold of my arms Tasha practically dragged me towards the mall. We spent hours going through every store. She had bought something in each on too. And I was reminded of how much money royals had. Even if the moroi world had turned their backs on them. After four hours of endless shopping Tasha had reached her budget. And as I drove her back to the Academy she had fallen asleep again. We arrived in the middle of the moroi night. The sun was high, indicating that it was noon. Smiling at Tasha I gave her a hug goodbye, letting her keep my duster until the next day. After I walked towards the dorms. The school was still sleeping when I walked through the dorm halls. Sleepy I opened up the door to my room and practically fell into bed. Although I had managed to take off my pants and shoes. I then fell into a deep sleep and dreamed of someone I hadn't in a while…**

Oh shit. Oh shit. No no no no no no no!

**Tasha…**

OH HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT! I watched Roza's face, at first it looked like she'd been slapped, then she looked nauseous, then she looked guilty. She quickly composed her face and I hugged her to me. "Roza." I whispered in her ear. "It was nothing like the dreams I had of you. I swear. And she only entered my dreams once, I dream of you every night. I love you more than anything milaya. Please believe me." She shot me a startled look before cupping my face in her hands.

"It's okay Dimitri. Really, I know you love me. I just don't like hearing these things. Please don't think that means that I'm upset with you now. I love you too. Always." I grinned, relived and kissed her deeply.

Someone cleared their throat. Yeva. "Who wants to read next?"

"I will." Christian muttered, reaching over to take the book from Yeva.


	5. Chapter 5

Rose's POV

I could feel my heart breaking slightly. But I know that Dimitri loves me and that Tasha was just a distraction, but still…ugh this is so frustrating! But I have to put on a brave face. "Oh Sparky I never knew that you were such an avid reader. Or do you just wanna know what it takes to get into Dimitri's heart?" He ignored me and began reading. God I really didn't want to listen to this. I snuggled closer to Dimitri and his arms tightened around me. He pressed a kiss to my forehead and I smiled. I started paying attention to Sparky and realized that I had missed a bit while I was thinking.

**A couple minutes passed before Rose's mom came walking towards me. Sitting up straight I gave her a respectable nod. "Belikov." She said as she sat down with her own cup of coffee.**

"**Hathaway, how are you doing?" I asked, although I really didn't care, I just wanting out of here.**

**She looked down at her coffee before answering. "Good. I 'm guessing you didn't hear about what happened to Rose during practice."**

**Hearing the mentioning of Rose's name and that she was possibly hurt made me sit even straighter in my chair. "Is she okay?"**

**Janine looked up at me, I had realized then that I had let some of those emotions slip. And was soon relieved that Janine had taken it in a teacher concern instead. "Yes, she's fine. We were fighting and I punched her in the head. When I took her to the clinic they said she would have a bruised eye. But was saved from a concussion."**

**I let out a sigh of relief. "Well that's good."**

**Janine took a sip of her coffee. "Yeah, I'm just surprised at how much of a hot head she can be."**

**I tried to hide my smile at that. "Yeah, try dealing with her every day. Especially when she's in a bad mood."**

"You make it sound like you didn't want to be around her every day." Lissa mused. "But you love her so…ugh never mind continue." Dimitri looked at me guiltily but I shook my head.

**Janine didn't even smile. "I guess I don't know my own daughter." I looked at her with sympathy. Rose was a great kid,**

"Kid? Kid?!" I muttered angrily, guess he really did think of me as a child back then. Ouch. That thought hurt, I winced slightly and Dimitri began putting small kissed on my neck to calm me down. But I was too pissed off right now to enjoy it.

**But when it came to a situation that she didn't like, well then she was uncontrollable. Shrugging Janine stood up. "Great seeing you again Belikov." And before I could say anything more she stood up and left her barely touched coffee on the table. Later that day I decided to go to the gym to practice. I was surprised when I saw Tasha in there as well. **

"**Dimka!" She said as she ran up to hug me. Surprised I hugged her back. "How did you sleep?"**

**I smile down at her. "Great I had a dream about you."**

I'm pretty sure I was shaking. This was too much.

"**Oh?" She said, and under that pale skin I saw the blood rise to her cheeks.**

"**Yeah and it was…" I stopped then. Seeing her look at me the way Rose did was just too much for me.**

Oh now we all look at the great Dimitri Belikov like we're in love with them do we? Humph. I could feel myself getting more and more pissed off. I stood up abruptly. "I'm getting a drink. Anyone want a drink?" I said quickly, my voice cracking slightly. God I need alcohol to get through this. Adrian walked into the kitchen behind me and started taking out the alcohol. Praise the lord. "Make me something strong, I don't care what it is." He nodded and began mixing the drinks, after handing me one we exited the kitchen. Christian began reading again.

**What was I doing?**

Yes I was wondering that myself.

**Yes I was locking my feeling away for Rose. But to hit on another woman was shameful and wrong. I didn't want to hurt Rose that way.**

"At least you were kinda looking out for Rose's feelings." Sydney said lightly.

Dimitri groaned. "If I could go back and change this I would. I love Roza with everything that I am, I shouldn't have even tried to replace her."

**Looking back at Tasha I swallowed hard. "Sorry, I…I got to go." Leaving the gym as quickly as possible I couldn't help but think of how stupid I was. **

"You and me both, brother." Vika said, glaring at Dimitri. Glaring at _my_ Dimtri, he was mine yes? I looked up at him and mouthed 'I love you' he gave me a brilliant smiling. Yep. Mine.

**I shouldn't be flirting with Tasha. Especially a moroi. I had a reputation to keep and if I kept doing that I would end up losing concentration and skill. I practically ran to the dorms, I needed to get as far away as possible from both Rose and Tasha. The one who I actually wanted, and the other who I had wanted a long time ago. Who said being a teacher at a high school was easy?**

"Well that was enlightening." Tasha said brightly. I just groaned slightly.

"C'mere Comrade." I said, getting up and moving towards the kitchen. I could hear Dimtri following me but I was more focused on his present. The one I got almost a year ago, the one I never gave him. Will he like it?

"What is it my Roza?" He said quietly when we entered then kitchen, pulling me into his arms. I turned and handed him the gift.

"Open it." I said shyly. He gave me a quick kiss before letting me go to open the package. He tore off the wrapping paper and gasped when he pulling out the duster I had gotten him.

"Roza-" I cut him off.

"Wait, there's more." I took the duster out of him hands opened it so I could show him the inside. I had had 'My heart will always be yours. Your Roza' sown into the inside. He read it and gasped again. Turning to me he pulled me in his arms so quickly that I didn't even have time to blink.

"Oh Roza, I love it. I love you. You are the most magnificent person I have ever met. I'm so glad that I found you." He kissed me deeply.

"I love you too Dimitri. I love you too."


	6. Chapter 6

Dimitri's POV

I looked down adoringly at the women in my arms. _This_ was my present, the one she was so worried I wouldn't like? I understood now how completely I had convinced her that I cared for Tasha during that time. Oh how I wished I could go back and change the things that I did. "Oh Roza, you are the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm so sorry, for everything."

She looked up at me lovingly, an expression I now she reserved just for me. "You're the best thing that happened to me too, Dimitri. Don't worry about the past, we both made mistakes back then." She kissed me deeply before pulling me back towards the living room. "C'mon we gotta finish reading, Comrade." I groaned but followed, plopping down on the sofa and pulling Roza in my lap. Sydney was holding the book and she began reading as soon as we sat down.

**The rest of the day consisted of me hiding in my dorm. Mainly from Tasha. I needed time to reflect in my feelings for her as well as Rose. Rose was dangerous, I couldn't love her without it ending badly for the both of us. Our feelings for each other were also distracting. And a distraction like that could lead to death or worse. And I couldn't afford loosing that concentration. Neither could she. Maybe in five more years Rose and I can settle down and finally stop putting our feelings aside, but for right now she needed a mentor that was strict and focused. Not some love crazed teacher that couldn't control his feelings for his student.**

Roza pouted at me, she was so adorable. I chuckled quietly and kissed her nose, internally kicking myself for this any of this.

**Tasha on the other hand, I could have a relationship with, and it would be safe. No one would question it. She's also of age and would provide a great distraction from Rose. But that was the problem; I couldn't just leave Rose for Tasha, not only would it make me a jerk, but it would also break Rose's heart. I was positive in the beginning that I could hurt Rose and it would be okay. But now I wasn't so sure. Rose didn't deserve such punishment. Yet it would be the only solution to get her off my back and get her to focus. I hated being mean, but at the same time all I could think of was it's the right thing.**

Ah, shit. I did not think that, ugh I did. How could I ever think hurting Roza in anyway was acceptable? All the females in the room were staring at me. Except my Roza, she was playing with my fingers. "I can't even…how..do you have a brain, you ass?" Vika sputtered.

"He obviously doesn't if he thought he could get away with treating Roza like that." My mother said primly. Yeva just glared, Sydney and Mia were shaking their heads, Lissa was looking at Roza worriedly, and Vika looked like she was about to burst into tears.

"Hey now, he was making the right choice." A new voice broke in, Tasha. "Pity he didn't go through with it." I glared at her and Sydney began reading again.

**So I went to bed that night trying to come up with ideas on how to get Rose away from me, but at the same time without hurting her. And sadly…I came up with one solution… The next day I found Rose laughing and smiling with Mason. Careful not to let my feeling overtake me I made my way towards her. Mason wandered off just as I showed up for our practice. As we walked towards the gym I felt her mood shift. As she went out of her way to avert her gaze. Although she didn't know I knew why. **

I felt myself tense as Sydney began reading this scene. This was right before the party, the party that I said yes to Tasha at. Rose never knew that I said yes, oh fuck. This is going to make Roza upset, the insulting things I thought about her in this chapter and how quickly I dismissed her in the next. I scanned my love's face quickly, she was chewing her lip with a…guilty? Yep, guilty expression. I tuned back into Sydney surprised that I had actually missed quite a bit when I was worrying.

"**The whole profound Zen crap thing. You don't talk to me like a real person. Everything you say is just some wise life lesson nonsense. You really do sound like a Christmas special." She lashed out, full of anger. Her voice rose even higher, to where she was practically shouting. "I swear, sometimes it's like you just want to hear yourself talk! And I know you're not always this way. You were perfectly normal when you talked to Tasha. But with me? You're just going through the motions. You don't care about me. You're just stuck in your stupid mentor role." **

**I stared at her, never before had she hurt me that badly before.**

The Rose in my arms started shaking. "I'm so so sorry, Dimitri. I don't know why, I mean I know now that it was spirit but that no excuse. I'm a horrible person, it's no wonder that you wanted to get away from me." I glanced down at her, surprised to see tears pouring down her beautiful face. I quickly brushed away her tears and kissed her quickly.

"It's okay, milaya, really. I have said and done much worse to you than what you said then. You shouldn't feel bad, please. I hate seeing you upset." She nodded quickly and then snuggled closer to me, I happily wrapped my arms around her tightly, burying my face in the crook of her neck. Once she was comfortable I motioned to Sydney to continue.

**And I wouldn't let her see me that way, so I hid it as best as I could. "I don't care about you?"**

"**No." She jabbed my chest with her finger. And just that slightest poke hurt me more than a stake would. "I'm just another student to you. You just go on and on with your stupid life lessons so that-" I had enough of her than; I suddenly reached out and grabbed her pointing hand.**

Roza whimpered slightly and I kissed her temple, tightening my arms around her protectively.

**I pinned it to the wall, and I could see the surprised look on her face as I did so. "Don't tell me what I'm feeling." I growled. I knew deep down that I shouldn't be this upset. But half of the things that she had said were true. I was almost always calm, and in control—even when fighting. I had been exactly like her once—always on the verge of acting without thinking, done things I knew I shouldn't. And she was headed down the same path.**

**Her eyes lit up then. "That's it, isn't it?"**

"**What?"**

"**You're always fighting for control. You're the same as me."**

"**No," I said. "I've learned my control." I lied**

"I knew it…" Roza murmured to herself. I smirked at that.

"**No, you haven't. You put on a good face, and most of the time you do stay in control. But sometimes you can't. And sometimes…" She leaned forward, lowering her voice. "Sometimes you don't want to."**

"**Rose…" My breathing was labored, my heart racing as I tried my best to stay in control. And before I had realized what she was about to do she kissed me. Our lips met, and uncontrollably I kissed her back. I pressed myself closer, trapping her between me and the wall. I wanted more of her, and all those emotions that I had tried to keep locked up came pouring out. I held her hand as my other one snaked behind her head, sliding into her hair. The kiss was filled with intensity, anger, passion, release, and so much more. And I couldn't help but think back to that night in my room. My body ached to bring her back and finish what we had left undone. And that's when I realized what I had just done. I jerked away from her and took several steps back. "Do not do that again." I said stiffly.**

"**Don't kiss me back then." She retorted.**

**I stared at her for a long time. "I don't give 'zen lessons' to hear myself talk. I don't give them because you're another student. I'm doing this to teach you control."**

"**You're doing a great job." She said bitterly. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to regain control before I lashed out at her. Exhaling I muttered 'you're right' in Russian. Without another glance at her, I turned and left the room.**

Rose buried her head in her hands. "I'm so sorry, Dimitri. I was being such a pushy, whiny little bitch. Maybe if I had backed off and not relied on you so much then you would have been able to have the family you've always wanted. I took that away from you without even thinking and I feel so so guilty." I was shocked, more than shocked by what she said. So this was where her guilt was coming from? Ridiculous, like I could be happy without her.

"Roza," I crooned softly, "I would never have left you even if you didn't act the way you did. But don't feel bad about how you acted, I wasn't being very fair to you back then either so I probably would've acted the same as you. Please baby, let's not think of this now. Let's just get these over with." I put my mouth right next to her ear, smirking when she shivered delicately. "I want you all to myself again." She grinned happily while Tasha glared at us from the background.

Janine interrupted our moment. "I think I want to read now."


End file.
